Is your hiring process accidentally pushing away amazing neurodiverse engineers?

What's the problem?

Let's be honest. Finding and keeping great engineers is tough. You know how much one brilliant engineer can change the game. But what if I told you that, without even realizing it, your own hiring process might be the biggest thing scaring off the exact people you want to hire? And even worse, it could be systematically shutting the door on the neurodiverse, women and folks from underrepresented groups. If your hiring pipeline feels dry (or your team photos look a little too… similar) it’s time to get real about what’s happening internally.

I've spent decades helping companies build teams that don’t just perform, but thrive because they're diverse and well-led. I've seen too many good intentions get derailed by hiring habits that just don't work, especially for women and engineers who don't fit a narrow, outdated mold. So, let’s break down some of these common tripwires and how to step around them.

1. The "Unicorn" Job Description

"Our ideal candidate can write flawless code, communicate like a seasoned diplomat, juggle flaming torches, and has preferably discovered a new prime number in their spare time."

You’ve seen them: job descriptions that read like a wish list for a mythical creature. They're either so vague no one knows what the job really is, or they demand so many "must-have" skills (that aren't actually day-one critical) that great people just scroll on by. Top engineers want to know what problems they'll be sinking their teeth into, not decipher a puzzle just to work out if they should even apply for your job writing CRUD apps for veterinarians.

The Real Talk: That overloaded job spec? It often screams "we don't actually know what we need" or "we expect you to know everything." This can turn away people straight away.

The Neurodiversity Kicker: Neurodivergent individuals, particularly those on the autism spectrum, may interpret job descriptions very literally. Ambiguity, unstated expectations, or an overwhelming list of "essentials" can cause significant anxiety and lead them to opt out, even if they possess the core skills. Vague language about "excellent communication skills" can also be a barrier if the unstated expectation is a specific neurotypical communication style.

The Diversity Kicker: Here’s a well-known secret: studies (and a lot of anecdotal evidence) show women often only apply if they feel they nail nearly 100% of the listed criteria. Men? They're more likely to throw their hat in the ring at 60%. Add in some "bro-grammer" lingo like "ninja" or "rockstar," and you’ve just discouraged a huge pool of talent without even knowing it.

Try This Instead: Get your current team involved. What are the absolute core things this person needs to do and know? Be ruthless. Everything else is a "nice to have." Use neutral language (scan it with a gender decoder tool if you're unsure. Yes, they're a thing.). Talk about the impact they’ll make, the team they’ll join, and how they can grow. Focus on a supportive culture.

2. The Hiring Marathon (That Feels Like an Obstacle Course)

"By the time I finish all these interview rounds, the tech stack will be obsolete."

Seriously, if your process takes weeks, has endless stages, or throws complex, time-sucking technical tests at people before you've even had a real conversation, you’re losing out. The best engineers have options, and they’ll bail for a company that moves more decisively.

The Real Talk: A super long, clunky process doesn't just make you look inefficient; it makes candidates feel like their time isn't valued. Those massive take-home assignments before anyone’s even said hello? A huge turn-off for busy, experienced people.

The Neurodiversity Kicker: Multiple, lengthy interviews can be a huge drain and sensory overload for neurodivergent candidates. Unexpected changes to the schedule, unclear agendas, or environments with lots of distractions (even virtual ones) can be particularly challenging for individuals with ADHD or autism. Timed, high-pressure tests might not allow them to showcase their true abilities, especially if they process information differently.

The Diversity Kicker: Women and anyone who's a primary caregiver often have less spare time for endless interview loops or multi-day homework assignments. A drawn-out process also gives unconscious bias more chances to sneak in. If it feels like a gauntlet, it might suggest a company culture that doesn’t respect personal time – a big red flag for many.

Try This Instead: Cut the fat from your process. Have a clear plan and tell people what it is. Make sure every step actually tells you something new and important. If you do technical tests, make them relevant, shorter, and maybe later in the game. Be flexible with scheduling. And please, diverse interview panels at every key point.

3. "Culture Fit" – The Ultimate Excuse for Sameness

"They're a great culture fit for our new fintech - they went to my alma mater, enjoy artisanal kombucha, and quoted the same obscure sci-fi movie about space-rats!"

Everyone wants a team that gels, but "culture fit" is often a lazy, biased way to hire people who look and think just like the current team. That’s how you end up with an echo chamber, not an innovation hub.

The Real Talk: What you should be looking for is "culture add." Who brings in new ideas, different experiences, and valuable perspectives that will make the whole team better?

The Neurodiversity Kicker: Social communication differences are a hallmark of some neurodivergent profiles (e.g., autism). Directness might be misinterpreted as rudeness, or less eye contact as disinterest. Sticking to preferred topics or having different social engagement styles can be wrongly flagged as "not a good fit" by untrained interviewers looking for neurotypical social cues.

The Diversity Kicker: This is a big one. If "fit" really means "do they remind me of myself?" or "would I want to grab a beer with them?", you’re in trouble. Women and people from different backgrounds might communicate differently or have different interests. Judging them as "not a good fit" based on that is just bias in action.

Try This Instead: Forget "culture fit." Define your company values and the actual behaviors that bring those values to life. Ask questions that dig into those values. Ask what unique strengths they bring. Get your interviewers trained on spotting and stopping unconscious bias. Diverse panels here are non-negotiable.

4. Your Interrogation (Masquerading as an Interview)

"So, tell me, if you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be, and how would that help you optimize our database?"

If your interviews are just a barrage of trick questions, or one person dominates the whole conversation, or candidates don’t get a real chance to ask their questions and get a feel for you, you’re doing it wrong.

The Real Talk: Candidates are interviewing you too. They want to know what it's really like to work on your team, with you as a leader.

The Neurodiversity Kicker: Abstract or multi-part questions without a chance to clarify can be very difficult for some neurodivergent people who prefer concrete, direct language. Literal thinkers might struggle with hypotheticals if they aren't grounded. Pressure to maintain eye contact or conform to specific body language norms can also detract from their ability to focus and articulate their thoughts. Sensory aspects of the interview room (lighting, noise) matter too. If they're spending brain cycles thinking about how you want them to appear, they might not be focussed on thinking about what you actually want.

The Diversity Kicker: An aggressive interview style can be a major deterrent, especially for women or people from cultures where that kind of directness isn't the norm. Also, if the interview panel looks like a carbon copy of itself, it sends a pretty clear message (or lack thereof) about belonging.

Try This Instead: Teach your team how to interview inclusively. Use structured interviews – the same core, skill-based questions for everyone. Mix up the technical stuff with questions about how they solve problems, work with others, and handle setbacks. Make sure your panel is diverse and creates a space where people feel comfortable being themselves. And always, always leave plenty of time for their questions.

5. The Candidate Experience Black Hole

"We like to keep candidates on their toes. And by 'on their toes,' I mean in a perpetual state of wondering if we still exist or ran out of runway."

No updates for weeks? Vague (or no) feedback? Ghosting people? This stuff kills your reputation. Engineers talk. Bad news travels fast.

The Real Talk: Every single interaction (or lack of it) tells a candidate something about your company. Even if you don’t hire them, a good experience can turn them into someone who says great things about you.

The Neurodiversity Kicker: Uncertainty and lack of clear communication can be exceptionally stressful for many neurodivergent individuals, especially those with anxiety or autism who benefit from predictability. Not knowing what to expect next, or why a delay is happening, can be a major barrier.

The Diversity Kicker: A crummy experience can feel even worse for people who already feel like they’re navigating an uphill battle in tech. If they sense they’re not being taken seriously, it just reinforces negative assumptions about whether your company is really for them.

Try This Instead: Talk to people! Keep every candidate in the loop. If it’s a "no," tell them, and if you can, give a little constructive feedback. Treat everyone with respect. Maybe even assign someone to be a "candidate guide" through the process. Ask for feedback on your process – you might learn a lot.

6. Forgetting to Sell an Inclusive Opportunity

"We say we want different perspectives, but mostly we mean 'different ways to agree with the boss'."

You’re not just picking talent; you’re convincing them to pick you. If you’re not talking about the cool challenges, the chances to grow, the impact they’ll have, and your genuine commitment to a diverse and inclusive workplace, you’ll lose out.

The Real Talk: Good engineers want more than a paycheck. They want to do cool stuff, learn, make a difference, and feel like they belong.

The Neurodiversity Kicker: Neurodivergent candidates will be looking for signals that the environment supports different ways of working. Highlighting flexible hours, options for quiet workspaces, clear communication protocols, mentorship, and a culture that values deep focus or unique problem-solving approaches can be highly attractive. Vague answers about support will be a red flag.

The Diversity Kicker: Women and engineers from underrepresented backgrounds are also actively looking for signs that a company walks the D&I talk. If your interviewers are all the same, if your website looks homogenous, if questions about work-life integration or employee groups get blank stares, they'll notice.

Try This Instead: Get your interviewers pumped to talk about the projects, the team vibe, how people grow, and what you’re doing on the D&I front. Show off your diverse role models on interview panels - not as objects to be admired, but real people as part of your team. Be open about your D&I efforts. Talk about flexible work, parental leave, mentorship, or any relevant employee groups. Make it clear this is a place for everyone.

7. Fishing in the Same Old Pond

"We value diverse backgrounds, as long as that background includes a referral from someone already on our team."

The absolute best engineers? They're often not even looking. If you're only relying on referrals and posting on the big job boards, you're missing a massive chunk of talent, especially diverse talent.

The Real Talk: Building relationships with people before you have a job opening can be gold.

The Neurodiversity Kicker: Neurodivergent individuals may not engage with traditional networking or might be part of specific online communities. They may also be less inclined to self-promote in conventional ways.

The Diversity Kicker: If you only rely on your existing team's networks, you'll likely get more of the same. To find more women and underrepresented engineers, you have to go where they are.

Try This Instead: Build an employer brand that people from all backgrounds actually want to work for. Encourage your team to get out there and connect widely. Proactively reach out to and partner with groups like Society of Women Engineers, Women Who Code, Black Girls CODE, Latinas in Tech, and organizations focused on neurodiversity employment like Specialisterne. Show up at their events. Make it obvious you value what they bring.

Turning your hiring from a hurdle into a welcome mat

Look, changing your hiring process isn't a quick fix. It takes real effort and a commitment to being honest about what's working and what's not – especially when it comes to diversity. It’s about making your process efficient, fair, respectful, and genuinely good at spotting the amazing skills and different viewpoints that will make your team incredible.

As tech leaders, it's on us to build these better processes. When you start looking at hiring through an inclusion lens, you don’t just find "better" talent – you start building the kind of innovative, powerhouse teams everyone wants to be a part of.

So, what’s tripping you up in hiring, especially with neurodiversity?